The obsession with self-storage

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It is much better to die of hunger unhindered by grief and fear than to live affluently beset with worry, dread, suspicion, and unchecked desire.
Epictetus
55 – 135 A.D.

I want to discuss a growing trend that’s been taking place around the country: the proliferation of self-storage businesses. It seems that these things just keep cropping up, and apparently, they do very well.

And if you study residential housing, the size of the single family home has also increased. The standard house now is described as 3, 2 and a den: that’s three bedrooms, two baths and a den. Fifty years ago, it was easy to find a two bedroom, one bath house. Now, you might find that in a condo, but rarely in a new house.

Clearly, we want more space in our homes, and when that space is full, we’ll rent a self-storage unit to keep things we’re not currently using. C. Northcoat Parkinston formulated a set of truisms that became known as Parkinston’s laws. The most popular law was something like, “the work will expand to fill the time available to do it.” Another one stated that we’ll accumulate things to fill the available space. If he were still adding laws, I’m sure he’d declare that if we run out of space, we’ll go rent some more.

You may be wondering what’s wrong with keeping some of our possessions at a self-storage facility. My concern is what it says about our culture. We’re a consumer-driven society; in truth, we’re obsessed with consuming. We’re using up our resources at an alarming rate. We cannot sustain the current level of consumption.

We wouldn’t need self-storage facilities if we only owned those things which we use each and every day. If we limited our possessions to those things that we truly need to maintain a reasonable standard of living, we’d immediately put the self-storage industry out of business.

Now, I’m not throwing stones at the self-storage industry; they’re only fulfilling a need. What I find troublesome is the way our society is obsessed with owning things. We like to call them assets, but in truth, most are liabilities: the value isn’t increasing and it costs money to store them. I’ve personally seen cases where a year’s storage cost easily exceeded the value of the goods stored in the unit.

Before you join the ranks of those fueling the self-storage boom, ask yourself if you’d be better off selling or giving away the possessions you’re planning to store. Consider how much better your life would be if you had fewer material goods to look after, insure and store. I think it’s safe to say that the majority of people have far too many material possessions. Look for ways to get rid of some of the things you have. The fewer things you have to maintain, the less stress you’ll have in your life.

Instead of planning to get more things, consider ways to simplify your life. You’ll be able to increase your savings (or reduce your debt) in the process.

Every increased possession loads us with a new weariness.
John Ruskin
1819 – 1900

Copyright © 2013 by John Chancellor

Practice makes perfect

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The ideal condition would be, I admit, that all men should be right by instinct; But since we are all likely to go astray, The reasonable thing is to learn from those who can teach.
Sophocles
C 495 – 406 B.C.

How many times did you hear the phrase “practice makes perfect” when you were growing up? If your childhood was anything like mine, you heard it a few hundred times. I heard it enough that it’s burned in my memory.

And you know what? It’s totally wrong. Practice does not make perfect.

Let me share a story I heard about a karate instructor. He always told his students to only practice at the karate school. One day, a young boy asked why he couldn’t practice at home.

The teacher said, “If you practice at home, there’s no one to watch you and no one to catch your mistakes. There will be no one to coach you, to tell you what you are doing wrong and make sure you do things the correct way.”

Pick any activity: golfing, tennis, painting, playing a musical instrument, writing — if we practice any of these activities and we aren’t doing things correctly, what happens? The incorrect way of doing things becomes more ingrained. Practicing incorrectly just makes it more difficult to learn how to do things the right way. It doesn’t make things perfect. It doesn’t even improve things.

There are some activities where we accept the fact that we need a coach, teacher or qualified instructor. But there are so many other areas of life where we think we can do it on our own. It’s a common mistake most people make: we think we can practice without help or guidance. But analyzing this behavior reveals the underlying belief that we can practice and eventually we might master the activity by accident. That will almost never happen.

We’ll always master an activity more quickly if we seek out someone who knows more about it than we do and has the ability to share that knowledge with us. We need someone who can see what we’re doing incorrectly and show us the right way.

You need to take inventory of the areas of your life that aren’t running smoothly, where things could be improved. Then ask yourself who could help you practice in order to improve those areas.

The more important an activity is to your happiness and success in life, the more you’ll benefit by practicing under the guidance of a qualified teacher. Practice only makes perfect if you’re practicing with good feedback and guidance. Practice with the help and guidance of a good mentor, coach or teacher. It will greatly improve your performance.

Draw from others the lesson that may profit yourself.
Terence
c. 190 – 159 B.C.

Copyright © 2008 John Chancellor

Are your partners doing their share?

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Soldiers generally win battles; generals get credit for them.
Napoleon Bonaparte
1769 – 1821

Once, I was working with a couple of partners who owned and operated a small business. The partners were experiencing some friction and one called me to vent his frustration. His main complaint was that he was doing the majority of the work. In his opinion, the other partner wasn’t doing his fair share.

About a week later, I was still wondering how to deal with the problem when the other partner called and asked to have coffee with me. When we met, I was stunned to hear the same complaint: he felt like he was doing most of the work.

Each partner thought they were doing about 75% percent of the work and the other partner was only contributing 25%. So if you add up what each partner thought they were contributing, it comes to 150%. Obviously, the amount of work can’t exceed 100%, so one or both of the partners had incorrectly gauged their level of contribution.

As I begin to study the issue, I discovered the problem wasn’t limited to this small partnership. This dilemma is very common in marriage and committed relationships. In fact, it’s so common that psychologists have given it a name: relationship bias. In any relationship, we tend to be biased about our level of contribution to the relationship.

This issue also shows up in work teams and volunteer organizations. In almost any situation where people are working together, there’s a strong possibility that one or more of the participants feels like they’re doing more than their fair share.

While we have full knowledge of the work we do for the team or the relationship, we typically don’t know the full extent of the work our partner(s) are doing. This gap in knowledge contributes to the bias about our own level of contribution. And when we focus mainly on our own efforts, we build up those contributions in our minds and unconsciously diminish the efforts of our partner(s).

There is a solution. I met with each partner individually and asked him to make a list of all the things the other partner did for the business. I requested an exhaustive list and insisted each one spend adequate time to do a thorough job. When you shift focus and force a person to think about their partner’s contribution before they think of their own, they come to realize how much effort they were overlooking.

If you’re in a committed relationship, I feel certain there are times when you think you’re doing more than your partner. Instead of focusing on all you do, I invite you to make a comprehensive list of all the things your partner brings to the relationship. If you lessen your responsibility bias, you will have a much greater appreciation for your partner.

You must accept responsibility for your actions, but not the credit for your achievements.
Denis Waitley
1933 –

Copyright © 2013 by John Chancellor